Latest art thoughts
It's been a while since my last blog post and there's some things that have been on my mind lately, so I thought it would be a good time to do some writing.
I just completed my three and a half week summer holiday from my day job. During that time I did a lot of drawing, which was really nice, although I have a bit of mixed feelings about drawing on (summer) holidays. On the other hand it's a perfect opportunity to immerse oneself in drawing and creativity as time or energy is usually not an issue but then again, summer weather is inviting to do some outdoor activities and all those things that I don't normally do. So, when I'm drawing I feel like I should be doing something else, and when I'm doing something else, I feel like I should get some drawing done. Oh well. Somewhere in the middle usually works the best for me.
I currently have about eight or nine pieces in progress and about fifteen ideas in line waiting to be executed. I guess I'm lucky in a way that my brain seems to be this tireless idea generator that constantly feeds me thoughts of what would be fun to draw. While I do think it's a good thing as so many artists are suffering from lack of ideas or art blocks, it actually also gives me a great deal of anxiety. My art style is quite detailed and time consuming so most of my pieces usually take at least two or three weeks to finish, often many months or sometimes even years. My brain is feeding me all these ideas but it's just impossible to execute them in a pace that my mind would want to and this creates a problem. It usually leads to the situation like I'm in now, with gazillion wip pieces as I feel that I'm in a hurry to get all the ideas on paper and then I get anxiety as I feel that it's just impossible to manage them all and I desperately try to finish at least something, just to make space for the next ideas in line. I have sometimes tried some simpler and quicker art styles but it doesn't really feel like home, despite being fun every once in a while. I do write down all my ideas though, so that they don't just swirl in my head but for some reason that isn't always enough and in some cases I actually need to get the drawing started before I can rest.
This leads to the thing that I have been thinking a lot lately. As stated, art and drawing often requires a lot of work and energy and sometimes it even creates anxiety or other mental health issues. For me, art is currently something that I do in my freetime and my income comes from elsewhere (I like it that way, for now at least). So why am I doing this actually? I go through all this trouble and spend long days on my drawing board finishing a piece that is actually going to end up in a storage box where I keep my other finished drawings. So I finish a drawing and… then what?
Some of you may remember my earlier blog post where I said that I don't really like to sell my original art, for various reasons. So the feeling after I finish a piece is actually a bit empty.
To prevent this blog post from becoming too negative, I must emphasize that I really do love drawing and making art, these are just some things that I have been thinking lately, some bumps in the road like in any other area in life. As to the question why I'm doing art in the first place, the answer is, after all, simple. Because I cannot not do it. It's a bit like breathing for me, I just need to do it. And for the most part, I absolutely love it. When other areas of life get rough, making art helps and provides a sanctuary from all the bad things. It's also my way of having fun.
Have you had similar problems, and if so, how do you deal with them? Any other thoughts on this topic? Send me a message through Instagram or email me at firstname.lastname@example.org